Spicy Black Bean Burgers

My Venture into Black Bean Burgers
I am still crazy busy at work so I'm having difficulty finding the time to cook for myself (let alone my blog). Not to mention, it's July and blazing HOT in Kansas so who wants to heat up their house with the stove?

When I was a vegetarian, I loved to make black bean burgers all of the time. They're healthy, fast and easy-to-make, and, best of all, can be frozen for use at a later date. Even though I'm no longer a vegetarian, I still cook these burgers from time-to-time because they are so darn good! I get a lot of requests for vegetarian dishes so I thought I would share this recipe. One day soon, I'll also share my veggie burger recipe. It's so good!

You can make these babies as spicy as you like. With just the jalapeno, they are not particularly spicy. Add the red pepper flakes and they definitely have a kick. Top them pepper jack cheese and spicy ranch dressing and WWOOOOOO WEEEEE they're spicy. The nice thing is that you can make them as spicy as you want – from mild to burn-a-hole-in-your-pants spicy.

You and your family are going to love these. I've never tried grilling them so I'm not sure how they would turn out. If you try grilling them, let me know. They hold together pretty well so they should maintain their shape even when grilled (but be careful when turning them so they do not break apart and fall through the grates). So blog buddies – relax a while, grab a lemonade, and make some of these tasty burgers. Enjoy – and happy summer cooking!

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Spicy Black Bean Burgers
(Printable Version)

2 15-oz cans black beans, rinsed and well drained
1 TBSP olive oil
1 small onion, chopped
1/4 c chopped red bell pepper
1 jalapeno (ribs and seeds removed), finely chopped
3 cloves garlic, minced
1 c seasoned bread crumbs
2 TBSP salsa
1 egg
1/4 c fresh cilantro (no need to chop)
1/2 tsp table salt or to taste
1/2 tsp black pepper
1/2 tsp red chili flakes (optional)
1/2 tsp cumin
1/2 tsp oregano, rubbed between your fingers
1/2 tsp chili powder
1/2 tsp onion powder
1/4 tsp garlic powder
1/4 tsp sugar
1/4 c whole kernel corn
Hamburger buns and your favorite condiments

Rinse and drain the black beans well. Reserve 3 to 4 tablespoons of the whole black beans. Add the remaining beans to a food processor.

Heat a skillet over medium heat with the olive oil. Add the onion and cook 3 to 4 minutes or until softened. Add the red bell pepper, jalapeno and garlic and cook 1 minute longer. Set aside and allow the mixture to cool slightly.

While the onion mixture is cooling, add the remaining ingredients to the food processor except for the reserved whole beans and whole kernel corn. Pulse several times – scraping down the bowl as needed. The bean mixture in the food processor should be thick and fairly smooth. Add the onion mixture to the food processor and pulse only 3 to 4 times – scraping down the bowl after each pulse. You still want to see some chunks of red pepper and jalapeno so do not puree the mixture too much.

Transfer to the bean mixture to a bowl and mix in the reserved whole black beans and corn. Cover and refrigerate for at least two hours to allow the bread crumbs to absorb any excess liquid.

If freezing the burgers, cut some parchment or wax paper into squares a little larger than the patties you will form. You will use the parchment to separate the patties so they do not stick together when frozen. Lay the parchment squares in a sheet pan in an even layer. Form a patty with some of the bean mixture. You can make the burgers as thick or thin as you would like. I prefer mine about 1/2" thick. Place the burger on one of the parchment squares and continue with the remaining bean mixture. Keep everything in a single layer. Freeze the burgers for a couple of hours then stack them (keeping a piece of parchment between each burger) in a resealable bag.

Cooking Burgers That Are Not Frozen: To cook the burgers, heat a skillet (uncovered) over medium heat with some olive oil (a tablespoon or so). Cook the patties until they are nicely browned – about 3 to 4 minutes per side. Serve on a bun with your favorite condiments. I like to serve them topped pepper jack cheese, spicy ranch dressing, lettuce, tomato, and a little onion – but you can add whatever you want.

Cooking Burgers That Are Frozen: You do not need to defrost the burgers before cooking them. Heat a skillet (somewhere between medium-low and medium heat) with the olive oil. Add the burgers and cover them with a lid while cooking. Because they are frozen, you need to cook them at a slightly lower temperature, covered, for a little bit longer than if they were thawed.

Homemade Protein Bars

My Venture into Protein Bars
There are times when I am in a hurry and I don't have time to sit down for a proper breakfast or lunch. Meal-replacement bars are a great way to get a bite to eat without resorting to fast food. To me, however, most commercially sold protein bars, cereal bars, and energy bars are little more than glorified candy bars that are loaded with empty carbs, high-fructose corn syrup, and overly processed ingredients.

Over the years, I've gone through phases when I've purchased protein bars by the bag full. They are SO outrageously expensive. On top of that, some protein bars are so hard to chew that I practically pull out my teeth trying to take a bite out of one. Finally, I said enough is enough and I set out to formulate my own protein bar.

I wanted a bar that was high in protein, had a good amount of fiber, was not overly sweet nor carby, and had heart-healthy fats. I wanted to make a bar made with wholesome ingredients that I could pronounce that would not leave me feeling guilty about eating later on. I also wanted a bar that would keep me full and not leave me feeling deprived like many store-bought bars do. Most of all, I wanted the bar to TASTE GOOD and not taste like I've just taken a bite out of the business section of the telephone book. Is this too much to ask for a meal-replacement bar?

These bars are very high in protein and will keep you full for hours. The fiber will keep your blood sugar from spiking too fast. Every ingredient in these bars have health value – even the cinnamon and salt. Yes, salt. Salt, after all, is a nutrient and is only bad when it is over-consumed. I actually feel like I'm being HEALTHY when I eat one of these great-tasting bars. I never miss fast food when I make these babies. They also make great snacks when you're in the mood for something a little sweet.

These bars are not baked and can be thrown together in less than 10 minutes. You can prepare them the night before so the family can grab them as they're heading out the door in the morning. You could eat one on the way to work while listening to a CD of Cher's greatest hits or while riding the bus next to some guy with a mohawk, pierced lips, and tattooed eyeliner. They are so easy to make, ask your kids to help you make them. I store them in the fridge for those times I need a quick meal or a healthy snack. Do you have teenagers who never have time for breakfast or a husband who thinks a Pop Tart is part of a well-balanced meal? If so, these bars are perfect! You can even throw some in your kids' book bags if they get a little hungry at school. Give these bars a try and see how you like them. I hope you like them as much as I do. Trust me – healthy eating never tasted so good! Enjoy – and happy barring!

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Homemade Protein Bars
(Printable Version)

3/4 c old-fashioned oats
½ c oat flour
1/2 tsp table salt
1 1/2 tsp cinnamon
2 scoops vanilla protein powder
1/2 c non-fat dry milk
2 TBSP flaxseeds, finely ground
2 TBSP sunflower seeds
1/3 c peanut butter (natural peanut butter works great!)
2 tsp vanilla
1/4 c water
1/4 c honey or to taste
1/2 c nuts (as pictured, I used almonds, pistachios, and cashews)
1/2 c dried fruit (as pictured, I used dried cherries, dried cranberries, and dried apricots)

Line an 8x8" dish with foil leaving a few inches of extra foil extending over edges of the dish. You will use this extra foil to grab onto when you remove the bars from the dish later on. Very lightly spray the foil with cooking spray.

In a medium bowl, combine the oats, oat flour, salt, cinnamon, protein powder, dry milk powder, and seeds. In a small bowl, whisk together the peanut butter, vanilla, water, and honey. Microwave for about 45 seconds. Whisk then combine the liquid ingredients with the dry ingredients and stir to combine. The mixture will be quite thick. Add the nuts and dried fruit and stir to combine. Roughly spread the mixture into the foil-lined dish. Place a piece of plastic wrap directly on top of the "dough" and compress the mixture evenly in the dish. Leave the plastic wrap on and place in the fridge for an hour or until firm. After an hour, remove and discard the plastic wrap. Use the foil to lift the mixture out of the dish. Slide the mixture off of the foil and cut the block into 8 bars. Place the bars in a sealable container. Since this mixture contains no preservatives, I recommend keeping them refrigerated.

Notes:
1) I have never used instant oats with this recipe so I do not know if they will work as well.
2) Whole flaxseeds are not readily digestible so it is best to grind them in a spice grinder or a mini food processor. If you do not have a way to grind them, just make sure you chew the bars well to better ensure the flaxseeds will be absorbed and release their healthy goodness.
3) These bars can be made gluten-free if you buy the right brand of oats and protein powder.
4) Do you have teenage sons participating in sports? Consider increasing the protein powder by another scoop.
5) On a low-salt diet? Reduce or eliminate the salt.
6) Watching your blood sugar or carbs? Reduce the amount of honey (or substitute sugar-free maple syrup for the honey) and reduce the amount of dried fruit.
7) Watching your fat intake? Reduce the amount of peanut butter and/or nuts.
7.5) Watching your salt, carbs, AND fat intake? Skip this recipe and eat the wrapper off of a ding dong.

Oven-Baked Curried Chicken

My Venture into Oven-Baked Curried Chicken
I love curry! I know what you're thinking. This recipe sounds spicy. It's not! In fact, I normally use mild curry when I make this chicken (even though I love spicy food) and it was not spicy-hot AT ALL.

I've been experimenting with this recipe for years. I've even tried frying the chicken in oil in a skillet on the stove top – and that was a culinary disaster! The spices in the curry burned very easily so it turned out to be a blacked chicken mess – with very little curry flavor. When baked in the oven, it may not get as crispy as deep frying but the flavor is a thousand times better. On top of that, it's healthier and much easier to clean up.

I've done this recipe with chicken wings, breasts, and thighs. However, I don't like to mix those cuts and bake them all at one time because they cook at different rates. I usually buy a pack of, for example, chicken breasts so I don't have to worry about the varying cooking times of white and dark pieces (or big and small pieces). If you decide to bake a mixture of different cuts all at one time, you'll have to watch them carefully to make sure that they are all cooked to the proper internal temperature (170F for dark meat and 160F for white meat).

This recipe is incredibly easy to make, requires very few ingredients, can be inexpensive to prepare, and is on the table with very little effort. You will love the smell of the chicken as it bakes but you will like it even more when you taste it. Your taste buds will thank you. This recipe is perfect for curry lovers who want to try something a little different – without burning your mouth on that spicy curry at your favorite Indian restaurant. Enjoy – and happy eating!

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(Printable Version)

8 - 10 pieces of chicken (skin-on and bone-in)
Salt and pepper
Oil for spritzing or brushing

Mixture for Dredging:
1 cup flour
1/3 cup curry powder (mild or spicy)
3/4 tsp table salt
1/4 tsp black pepper
1/4 tsp cayenne pepper (optional)

About six hours before baking the chicken, liberally salt and pepper the pieces of chicken. Place the chicken on a sheet pan in a single layer and place the pan in the refrigerator.

After about six hours, remove the chicken from the refrigerator. Preheat the oven to 350F. Line a sided sheet pan with some heavy-duty aluminum foil. Spray the foil with some cooking spray and set aside.

In a medium bowl, combine the flour, curry powder, 3/4 tsp of table salt, 1/4 tsp black pepper, and cayenne (if using). Thoroughly dredge each piece of chicken in the flour mixture and place the chicken on the sprayed sheet pan – skin-side up. Spritz just enough oil on the top of each piece of chicken to slightly moisten the flour.

Alternatively, you could lightly brush or dab on some oil on the top of each piece of chicken. Once the oven has preheated, bake the chicken for about 50 minutes for thighs (less for breasts and even less for wings).

Special Notes:
I prefer to use the same cut of chicken when making this recipe. For example, I prepared this recipe using all chicken thighs (as pictured here) and they cooked in 50 minutes (to an internal temperature of 170F). If you use all chicken breasts, they will take about 40 minutes (to an internal temperature of 160F). Chicken wings taste GREAT but only need about 30 minutes. I do not like using mixed pieces of chicken (breasts, thighs, wings, etc) because they cook at different rates and that makes it harder to not overcook or undercook some of the pieces.

If you are thinking of frying the chicken in a skillet, don't! The curry powder will burn in the oil and you'll have blackened chicken before it is cooked through. This recipe was not designed for shallow or deep frying.

Roasted Vegetables

My Venture into Roasted Veggies
I haven't met a vegetable I didn't like. Well, maybe a couple. I love roasting vegetables in the fall when many squash and root vegetables are at their finest. To be honest, I don't make this dish the same way twice. I pick out whatever veggies look good that day, throw on some olive oil, balsamic vinegar, dried rosemary, salt, and pepper and let 'em roast away. Sometimes, I add cipollini onions, boiler onions, or shallots. Other times I throw in Brussels sprouts, sweet potatoes, garlic, eggplant, peas, corn, green beans, turnips, beets – whatever's in-season, sounds good, or is on sale. The important thing is for you to choose vegetables that you and your family like to eat.

Even after I stopped being a vegetarian, I fixed this dish all of the time because it is so good. Kids love it because the vegetables are sweeter when roasted. At your next dinner party, you can serve this as an appetizer, a side dish, or even as the main course.

One time when I was in Asia, I was eating lunch with my friend Manny in the Taipei Airport. At the time, I was a vegetarian so I opted for a salad since everything else on the menu appeared to contain meat in some form or another. Manny is not an adventurous eater and ordered a hamburger and fries. The waiter took our order and we gabbed up a storm while we awaited our food. Manny is from Rhode Island and has the best sense of humor. He's a great guy and I appreciate his straightforwardness – a characteristic not shared by many of us who live in the Midwest. During the conversation, Manny dryly asked in his pronounced East-Coast accent, "Vince, don't take dis da wrong way but how does a vegetawiun become so LAHGE?" His question cracked me up but it's a good question. Many vegetarians are emaciated, little things but that's not always true. When you think about it, vegetarian mammals tend to be large. Elephants, hippos, rhinos, horses, cows, and many other large animals eat primarily vegetarian diets -- and they ain't skinny! Being a vegetarian doesn't automatically guarantee that you're going to be a size 2 by Christmas. After all, you could be a vegetarian and still consume a ton of calories from french fries, donuts, cake, Doritos, candy, garlic bread, soda pop, etc. – all of which contain no meat but a lot of calories, fat, and carbs.

Whether you're an omnivore or vegetarian, young or old, thick or thin, you're going to love this wonderful dish. Enjoy –and happy roasting!

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Roasted Vegetables
(Printable Version)

Longer-Cooking Veggies
1 small butternut squash, peeled and cut into 1" cubes
2 to 3 medium potatoes (preferable Yukon Gold or Red Bliss), peeled and cut into 3/4" chunks
1 cup or so of baby carrots (cut in half or leave whole)
1 pint of cherry tomatoes, halved
1 tsp sugar (optional but nice)
1 TBSP dried, chopped rosemary
2 TBSP balsamic vinegar
1/4 cup olive oil
Liberal amount of salt and pepper to taste

Quicker-Cooking Veggies
1 bunch of asparagus, fibrous ends removed and remaining pieces cut into thirds
1 large onion, cut into strips
1 red bell pepper, cut into 1" chunks
1 yellow bell pepper, cut into 1" chunks
2 TBSP olive oil
1 TBSP balsamic vinegar
Salt and pepper to taste

Freshly grated parmesan cheese (optional)
Crusty Bread or Bread Bowls

Place oven racks in the top third and bottom third of your oven. Preheat the oven to 425F. Coat the inside of two rimmed sheet pans with some olive oil.

In a large bowl, combine all of the ingredients for the longer-cooking veggies and toss to combine. Split the veggies between the two sheet pans. Bake 20 minutes, switching the sheet pans between the top and bottom racks halfway through the cooking time.

Right before the 20 minutes is up, combine the quicker-cooking ingredients. After the longer-cooking veggies have been in the oven for 20 minutes, take the sheet pans out of the oven and stir the veggies – using a spatula as needed to scrape up any that may have stuck to the pans. Add half of the quicker-cooking veggies to each sheet pan, toss again, and return to the oven for another 18 to 23 minutes (switching the pans halfway through) or until the veggies are as soft as you like. During baking, if the veggies look a little dry, add additional olive oil as needed.

Before serving, taste for seasoning and adjust as needed. If desired, toss with some freshly grated parmesan cheese. Serve in bread bowls or with crusty bread.

Mediterranean Couscous Salad

My Venture into Couscous
I can hear what you're thinking. "Couscous and Lentils?! I never cook with that stuff. This sounds too exotic for me." Don't be afraid! Couscous is nothing but granules of semolina (durum wheat) – the same stuff pasta is made out of. Lentils are a member of the legume family (like beans) and cook up in no time. In fact, the couscous and lentils each take only about 5 minutes to cook so you can throw this dish together really fast. There is nothing strange or exotic about their flavors. In fact, by themselves, they are a little on the bland side – like plain rice and beans would be.

I used to be a vegetarian and fixed this dish all of the time. Yes, it is healthy. Yes, it's protein rich. Yes, it's pretty to look at – but I didn't make it all of the time for any of those reasons. I fixed it because it is SO GOOD! It is truly very refreshing to eat. In fact, I could eat this entire dish in one setting so I REALLY have to control myself when I make it. It's great for picnics and potlucks. It's perfect at lunch. I woke up a while ago and just ate some for breakfast. I know, I know! I need help!

From the picture, you will notice that I forgot to add the slivered almonds. Ooops! You can certainly leave them out but I like the crunch they add to the dish. I sometimes add some finely, finely grated parmesan cheese to the dish as well. The cheese gives it a little extra flavor in the background. I didn't add it this time because I have a doctor's appointment in a couple of days. I always try to eat healthier right before going to the doctor so when he asks me if I have been dieting and eating healthful foods, I can say "Oh, yeah! Sure!" I tell you – if I had to go to the doctor every week, I'd weigh 13 pounds because I'd be forced to eat healthy all of the time. Let's hope my doctor is not reading this.

Anyway, don't let these unusual ingredients freak you out. You will love this dish! Enjoy – and happy couscousing!

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Mediterranean Couscous Salad
(Printable Version)

5 1/4 cups water, divided use
1/2 cup lentils (I use red but you can use any color)
1/3 cup finely chopped sun-dried tomatoes (not packed in oil)
2 shallots, finely chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
Zest of one lemon
1/4 cup finely grated carrots
1/2 cup slivered almonds
2 pinches salt
2 TBSP chopped fresh basil
1/4 cup freshly squeezed lemon juice (I use 1/3 cup)
1/3 cup olive oil
1/4 tsp salt
1 cup couscous
1/3 cup finely grated parmesan cheese (very optional)

In a medium saucepan, add 3 cups of water and the lentils. Bring to a boil and reduce to a gentle simmer and cook, uncovered, for 5 minutes. Taste the lentils. If they are not yet soft, cook another couple of minutes and taste again. You might have to cook yours for as long as 15 minutes. The important thing is to cook the lentils until they are JUST barely soft or they will quickly turn to mush. Drain and rinse the lentils under cool water. Allow the lentils to drain fully while preparing the remaining ingredients.

While the lentils are cooking, heat about 1 cup of water to boiling in the microwave. Add the water to the finely chopped sun-dried tomatoes to allow them to rehydrate some. Some brands of sun-dried tomatoes are particularly dry. Some are more moist. The kind I normally purchase are fairly moist so I only let them soak about 5 minutes. Soak them as long as you want to get your desired level of softness. When the tomatoes have rehydrated to your liking, drain off the water and add the tomatoes to a large bowl.

To the same bowl with the tomatoes, add the shallots, garlic, lemon zest, carrots, almonds, salt, basil, lemon juice, and olive oil. Whisk together and set aside while you prepare the couscous.

In a medium saucepan, bring 1 1/4 cups of water to a boil then add the salt and slowly stir in the couscous. Cover the saucepan, take it off the heat, and let it rest for 5 minutes. Use a fork to fluff the couscous. Let the couscous cool, uncovered, for about 5 minutes – stirring every minute or so with a fork.

Add the lentils to the bowl with the other ingredients. Add the couscous and stir to combine. Serve immediately or refrigerate for later use.

Notes:
1) I use extra-virgin olive oil in mine. However, if you are not used to using extra-virgin olive oil, choose your brand of olive oil wisely. If you do not like the flavor of your olive oil, the other flavors in this dish will not disguise that.
2) I like tart things. I normally add 1/3 of a cup of lemon juice, which makes this dish very lemony. I think that's a good thing. Some of you, however, may want to add a smaller amount (such as 1/4 cup of lemon juice). If needed, you can add a little more after you have tasted it at the end.
3) You can make this a day in advance and keep it refrigerated. If you do, I highly recommend that you use the full 1/3 cup of lemon juice because the flavors mellow a lot in the fridge.
4) You can find tri-colored couscous in many supermarkets nowadays. This adds a lot of festiveness to the dish. Couscous can be usually be found in the same aisle as rice or beans (or in the ethnic aisle). In my store, it is also sold in small packages in the produce section next to the packages of sun-dried tomatoes, shallots, etc.
5) Don't want to use lentils? No problem. You can use a can of black beans that have been rinsed and drained.

Tacos al Pastor (Healthier Version)

My Venture into Shepherd-style Tacos
Tacos al Pastor or Shepherd's Tacos are normally made with pork shoulder. Pork shoulder, although succulent, is not exactly figure-friendly. I decided to make a healthier version of these tacos by using lean pork tenderloin so I could eat them more often without all of the guilt.

The first time I had Tacos al Pastor was on a trip to Mexico that I made with a group of friends when I was in college. Two of the girls I was traveling with, Sarah and Heather, were these Angelina-Jolie-looking things that always attracted the attention of would-be suitors in every place in Mexico we visited. In one town, the three of us were walking down an alley lined with street vendors selling different foods, clothing, perfumes, fake watches, etc. The girls spoke with a slight twang and didn't speak a word of Spanish but still managed to communicate volumes with their big bosoms, fluttering eyelashes, and long, flowing hair.

I stopped at a stall selling something that looked like gyros. I watched them layer pork shoulder bathed in a chili/pineapple concoction on a vertical spit. When they turned it on, it slowly rotated -- cooking the pork with a heating element covering one side of the meat. Once it had cooked a while, the "chef" would shave off the outer edge of the meat and throw it on a grill to crisp up. They then served the meat in tortillas with a variety of toppings from which to choose. I asked the cook (in Spanish) what he was making and he said "Tacos al Pastor." He then went on to explain how they were made. They looked delicious so I, of course, had to buy one. I took one bite and was in heaven!

Meanwhile, Sarah and Heather were at another stall looking at some cosmetics. I don't want to be impolite and say that Sarah and Heather were "ugly Americans." They were a bit culturally insensitive and let's just leave it at that. Since neither of them spoke Spanish, they always spoke English to everybody they approached -- expecting the good people of Mexico to understand what they were saying. Even from a distance, I could hear every word of their conversation because they assumed that, by simply speaking louder, the Mexican shopkeepers would be better able to understand them. Heather was haggling with the cosmetics vendor over a small tube of Bonne Bell Strawberry-flavored Lip Smacker. I, meanwhile, took the opportunity to practice my Spanish with the taco vendor as I ate.

Heather and Sarah shared a fanny pack and they took turns wearing it. Neither liked wearing it because they thought it made them look fat. Trust me. I know how they feel. I look like I have about 20 of them strapped around my stomach and another 10 glued to my backside. That day, Sarah got stuck wearing it. Heather needed some money to pay for the lip gloss so Sarah unbelted the fanny pack, gave it to Heather, and held onto the lip gloss while Heather dug through the fanny pack looking for some spare pesos. For those of you who are from the UK and other parts of the world, a "fanny pack" is a "bum bag." I learned the difference the hard way when I asked a British lady one time where she got such a big fanny pack. I thought she was going to slap me. Anyway, Heather was digging for some pesos in the fanny pack while Sarah was standing there reading the label on the lip gloss. Without warning, a guy standing near them tried to snatch the fanny pack out of Heather's hands. She had a death grip on that thing so he didn't get away with it as easily as he would have liked. Heather put her foot up against his stomach to give her more leverage as they played tug-of-war with the fanny pack. That day, she was wearing cork wedge platform heel shoes that must have come from a stripper store and a very tight miniskirt and so I was shocked she could lift her leg so high with such ease. Sarah, on the other hand, just stood there like a deer in headlights saying "oh, oH, OH!". I had a choice to make. I could drop that heavenly taco and go help OR mind my own business and let the guy get away with a dime-store fanny pack filled with 7 pesos, a used Kleenex, and a year's supply of Kaopectate. The choice was clear. Sarah decided to help by throwing the lip gloss at the guy, which hit him in the chest and conveniently bounced into one of his hands. With one big jerk, he pulled the fanny pack out of Heather's hands and was off in a flash.

Meanwhile, Sarah was continuing to waive her hands in the air and screaming "oh, oH, OH!". Heather screamed "POLICIO! POLICIO!" and the cosmetics vendor pointed to a nearby building housing the local police department. Heather and Sarah tore off for the police station in a flash and I reluctantly followed – taco in-hand, of course.

When we got into the station, Heather ran up to the front desk and rang the bell, like, 40 times. A portly, older gentleman came to the counter and the conversation went something like this:

HEATHER: Oh my God! I just got mugged! He got all of our money!
SARAH: And some Bonne Bell Lip Smacker. Strawberry-flavored. It was brand new – you can ask that one guy. He'll vouch for us.
HEATHER: Who cares about the lip gloss?! My purse was my stolen!
SARAH: Well, actually, it was your fanny pack. You left your purse at the hotel.
HEATHER: WHATEVER! [Directing her attention back to the police guy] OK, it was a Mexican guy. He was wearing a red shirt with…
SARAH: It was more like cranberry.
HEATHER: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cranberry. A cranberry-colored shirt with blue jeans. He was, like, 5' 6" tall and had…
SARAH: No, I think he was a little taller than that. I'm 5' 6" so I'm thinking he's maybe 5' 8" or so.
HEATHER: OK, whatever. He was a short, Mexican guy. Anyway, he ran that way [pointing], you know, near that tack-o stand over there.

Meanwhile, I continued to eat my taco while staring at this mean-looking cat on the front counter that looked like he was just seconds away from mauling me. I tried to put some distance between me and the attack cat and accidentally bumped into Heather – causing some of the meat from my taco to fall onto her stripper shoes. I was so annoyed with myself for being so clumsy. After all, I wanted to eat EVERY morsel of that wonderful taco meat. Hmmm, I wonder if the 5-second rule would have applied in Mexico, too? Anyway, I digress…

HEATHER: Will you stop eating that STUPID tack-o and DO SOMETHING?!
VINCE: [With my mouth full] Wellth, whath do yous wanth ME to do?

Heather started sobbing, angrily flicked the taco meat off of her foot, and turned her attention back to the police guy.

HEATHER: [Slapping her hands on a tablet on the counter] WHY AREN'T YOU WRITING ANY OF THIS DOWN?!
POLICE GUY: Uuuuuuhhh, no Eeenglish. You espeak espanish?

I almost choked on my taco.

Heather, Sarah, and I eventually lost touch but I still have vivid memories of that day. It was the day I fell in love with Tacos al Pastor. This version is much healthier – but is still very tasty. It is SO good. Enjoy – and happy shepherding!

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Tacos al Pastor (Healthier Version)
(Printable Version)

Marinade:
8 Dried New Mexico Chilis (or a more traditional mixture of guajillo and pasilla chilis)
Water for steeping the chilis
1 large onion, roughly chopped
10 cloves garlic
1 TBSP cumin
1 1/2 tsp oregano
1 tsp paprika
2 TBSP kosher salt (or 1 TBSP table salt)
1 chipotle pepper (I normally add 2)
2 TBSP adobo sauce
2 TBSP vinegar
1 1/2 cups fresh pineapple

5 to 6 lbs pork tenderloin
Small tortillas (corn or flour)
Toppings: onions or scallions, limes, sour cream, chopped cilantro, cubed fresh pineapple, sharp cheddar cheese, etc.

De-stem and de-seed the chili peppers. Put the chilis in a saucepan and cover with water. Bring to a boil and remove the saucepan from the heat. Let the chilis steep in the hot water for about 25 minutes.

While the chilis are steeping, prepare the other ingredients and add them to a bowl. This includes roughly cutting up the onion, garlic, and pineapple as well as measuring out the other ingredients for the marinade.

When the chilis have steeped for about 25 minutes, remove the chilis from the water and add the chilis to a blender. Add about 1/2 cup of the steeping water to the blender as well to make it easier to puree the chilis. Discard the remaining steeping water. Fully puree the chilis. Using a fine-mesh strainer, strain the pureed chilis into a large bowl – pushing and scraping the chilis through the strainer. Discard the skins and solids that will not go through the strainer.

Add the remaining marinade ingredients to the blender and fully puree. Add the puree to the bowl with the strained chilis (no need to strain the other ingredients). Stir to combine, cover, and refrigerate about 1 hour.

Remove the pork tenderloin from the package and dry it well with paper towels. Remove all excess fat and silver skin. Cut the tenderloin lengthwise into 4 long pieces. Pour a little of the chilled marinade to coat the bottom of a 9x13" glass dish. Add the meat to the glass dish and cover with the remaining marinade. Make sure all of the pieces are fully coated in the marinade then cover and refrigerate about 1 1/2 hours. Do not marinate longer than 1 1/2 hours or the enzymes in the pineapple will start breaking down the meat.

About 20 minutes before the meat has finished marinating, take the meat out of the refrigerator to take the chill off. Start preheating your oven at 425F. Cover a rimmed sheet pan with aluminum foil then place an oven-safe rack in the sheet pan.

When the pork has finished marinating, place the pork on the rack. Make sure the top of the pork has nice, even layer of the marinade (discard any remaining marinade left in the glass dish). Place the sheet pan in the oven and pour about 1 cup of water into the sheet pan. Bake the pork for roughly 25 to 30 minutes or until the internal temperature of the pork has reached 160F. The cooking time is only a rough guide. Tent the pork and allow it to rest for 15 minutes before cutting.

Cut the pork into small, bite-size pieces. At this point, the meat may be refrigerated and the meat will taste even better the next day. This is especially nice if you are having a dinner party because you can cook the meat the day before.

To make the tacos, heat a large skillet over medium-high heat. Add about 1 TBSP of oil to the skillet. When the oil is hot, add a single layer of meat to skillet (don't overcrowd the meat). Don't move the meat because you want to develop a nice, brown sear on one side. Once seared, serve on warmed tortillas with an assortment of toppings. This preparation has significantly less fat than when prepared with traditional pork shoulder so eat it without the guilt.

Light Granola

My Venture into Health Snacks
Have you priced granola recently? It's outrageously expensive! It's also often full of sugar and fat – making the mixture far less healthful than it would outwardly appear. You and your kids will LOVE this recipe. The oatmeal has a ton of soluble fiber, which has been shown to reduce cholesterol when eaten regularly. The dried berries provide needed antioxidants and add natural sweetness to the mixture. Just be sure to buy dried berries without any added sugar. Depending on the nuts and seeds you use, they can add heart-healthy omega 3 fats, fiber, selenium, and Vitamin E. All of that is great but you know what? I eat this because it tastes really GOOD! It's great for an after-school or after-work snack. For breakfast, I often pour some milk over it and eat it like cereal. I also like to add it to yogurt for a quick and healthful snack. When you're craving something sweet, this really hits the spot – without all of the guilt afterwards! And since you're making it yourself, you know exactly what's going into it.

Make this granola and make it often. Your body will thank you. Enjoy – and happy snacking!

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Light Granola
(Printable Version)

2 cups Old Fashioned Oats
1 cup oat flour
1/2 tsp table salt
1 1/2 tsp cinnamon
1/3 cup Brown Sugar Splenda (or 2/3 cup Brown Sugar)
2 TBSP sugar-free pancake syrup (or real maple syrup)
4 TBSP butter, melted
2 cups of mixed dried fruits, nuts, and seeds (apricots, cherries, raisins, blueberries, cranberries, gojis, walnuts, cashews, pistachios, sunflower seeds, pumpkin seeds, etc)

TIP: I never buy oat flour. I just dump some oats into my food processor, whiz for about a minute, and then I have oat flour! It's so much cheaper this way and is so easy-to-do.

Preheat oven to 275F. In a large bowl, combine the oats, oat flour, salt, cinnamon, and Brown Sugar Splenda. Stir to combine. Add the syrup and stir well until the syrup is evenly distributed. Add the melted butter and again stir until all of the oats are evenly coated.

I like little, crunchy nuggets of granola when I eat it. To make the nuggets, grab a small handful of the granola mixture and firmly squeeze it in your fist to make glob. The mixture should hold together fairly well. Over a rimmed sheet pan, gently break the blob into smaller nuggets. Repeat with the remaining mixture. When finished, you should have a single layer of larger nuggets, smaller nuggets, and loose pieces of oatmeal. Don't move the granola once it is in the sheet pan or the nuggets will fall apart. Some people do not like larger nuggets of granola. If you prefer granola with loose pieces of oats, just dump the granola directly onto a sheet pan after you have mixed everything together. Just give the sheet pan a quick shake to evenly spread everything out.

Bake the granola for 20 minutes. Take the sheet pan out of the oven and very, very gently stir the granola. You, after all, do not want to break apart the nuggets you made earlier. Put the sheet pan back in the oven for another 8 minutes or so for a lightly toasted granola. If you like your granola really toasted, you can leave it in for several more minutes. Remove it from the oven and leave it in the sheet pan until it has cooled completely. The granola will get crispier as it cools. Toss with your desired mixed dried fruits, nuts, and seeds. Store in a sealed container.

After you make this the first time, make a note to yourself and decide if you would prefer the next batch to be sweeter or less sweet. I actually prefer my granola less sweet so I often add less Splenda than this recipe calls for. Others have preferred more sugar in theirs. You decide!

Sugar-Free Lemon Bread

My Venture into Figure-Friendly Desserts
I've been getting a lot of requests to post recipes for sugar-free desserts. I have several in my repertoire and plan to post more in the future. Figure-friendly desserts do not have to be bland and uninteresting. My batootie is big enough already so I'm thankful I don't have a sweet tooth. Every once in a while, however, I get hungry for something sweet. When I do, I particularly enjoy desserts prepared with fruits such as crisps and pies. I think that sweet-tart desserts are especially yummy. That's why I like this one.

This recipe is a variation of Ina Garten's Lemon Cakes. If you can afford the extra calories, try her original recipe sometime. The cakes pack a strong lemon flavor but I wanted to make them lighter. The flavor boost from ingredients like lemons is important when making sugar-free or reduced-sugar desserts. It also helps to mask some of the aftertaste that some sugar-free sweeteners can have.

Sugar substitutes are a great way to reduce you sugar consumption – but they are not perfect. Sugar does more than just sweeten foods. It also helps them to brown properly and can dramatically affect the texture of baked goods. Sugar substitutes, therefore, should not be truly called substitutes for sugar. They merely mimic sugar's sweetness but not its other qualities. However, for the big cost-savings in empty calories, I'm willing to put up with blonder baked goods with less-than-optimal textures. If prepared with regular sugar, this one loaf of lemon bread would have added more than 1500 empty calories to the loaf!

Don’t prepare this dessert and compare it to the original recipe. It's hard to find a sugar-free dessert recipe that stands up to a similar dessert prepared with sugar. It's not fair, after all, to make a hamburger with white turkey meat and then say it’s better when prepared with prime beef. Don’t call this diet food. Call it a tasty lemon bread – that happens to be sugar-free. Enjoy – and happy desserting!

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Sugar-Free Lemon Bread
(Printable Version)

Batter
4 TBSP butter, softened
1 cup plus 2 TBSP Splenda
Zest from 3 to 4 lemons (depending on their size)
1/2 tsp table salt
2 eggs
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour (or 3/4 cup all-purpose flour and 3/4 cup whole wheat flour)
1/4 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp baking soda
2 TBSP fresh lemon juice
1/3 cup plus 2 TBSP buttermilk
1 tsp vanilla

Lemon Syrup
1/3 cup fresh lemon juice
1/3 cup Splenda (or to taste)

Lemon Glaze
1 cup Splenda (or to taste)
2 TBSP cornstarch
1 1/2 TBSP fresh lemon juice

Preheat the oven to 350F. In a bowl, whisk together the flour, baking powder, and baking soda. Set aside.

Using a mixer, beat the butter, Splenda, lemon zest, and salt until light and fluffy (about 3 to 5 minutes). Add the eggs and mix, scraping the bowl as needed. Add the lemon juice, buttermilk, and vanilla and mix until combined. Slowly add the flour mixture until just combined (don't over mix).

Spray a loaf pan with cooking spray, pour in the batter, and bake until a toothpick comes out clean (about 35 minutes or so). Leave the bread in the pan for 10 minutes to cool. While the bread is resting, combine the lemon syrup ingredients. After the bread has rested for 10 minutes, carefully remove it from the pan and place it on a sheet pan. While the bread is still warm, slowly spoon the lemon syrup all over the bread – allowing it to soak into the bread as you add it. Allow the bread to cool completely.

When the bread has cooled, whisk the lemon glaze ingredients together and drizzle it all over the top of the bread.

Crab Salad

My Venture into Seafood Salads
I live in Kansas. Beef country. Seafood lovers are few and far between. Despite that, I can't help but love seafood in all of its glorious forms. My mother dislikes seafood so she rarely cooked fish when I was growing up – except for the occasional fish stick on Fridays during Lent. Nowadays, I eat seafood every chance I get.

My love affair with seafood started many years ago when I visited Asia for the first time. I can honestly say I have never had fresher seafood. One time while in South Korea, I was invited to dinner with a group of businessmen. I was the guest of honor and was treated like a king for a night. They took me to a fancy, schmancy seafood restaurant that was all the rage in Seoul. Since the menu was all in Korean, I asked my hosts to order something for me. After much discussion, they decided on a dish. Word of advice: When you're in another country, never let a stranger order something for you. If you have a queasy stomach, I recommend that you read no further.

When the food arrived, the waiter placed a big bowl of soup in front of me and all of the businessmen oooohed and aaaaahed at the beauty of my dish. I looked down at the bowl and it was a brothy soup made with lots of veggies and noodles and was topped with a baby octopus. It was truly a sight to be seen except for one small detail. The baby octopus…was still alive. Upon seeing that, a whole range of thoughts and emotions came flooding into my head. I wanted to scream like a school girl and go running from the restaurant but I quickly dismissed that option. I considered the possibility that it was an oversight and the chef simply forgot to cook the little sucker. From the pleased looks on my hosts' faces, I gathered that the dish was supposed to have been served this way. For those of you who have ever had to call the waiter because you found a fly in your soup, try having a LIVE OCTOPUS in it! I could not return this disgusting but exquisitely prepared dish. It would have insulted all of my hosts and, obviously, I couldn't do that. That meant [gulp] I had to eat..the baby...octopus. Not only did I have to eat him but I had to eat him fast because the poor thing was getting irritated from sitting on top of hot soup and was constantly trying to escape so I had to keep flicking him back into my bowl. I felt like every eye in that restaurant was on me as I picked up my chopsticks. I looked up and the businessmen were smiling and nodding in encouragement. As my hand drew closer to the octopus, the little guy raised one of his tentacles and reached out to grab one of my chopsticks and I thought, "Oh, geez, we got a fighter." It took every fiber of my being but I ate the whole thing. So, when I say I like fresh seafood, I don't like it THAT fresh. I don't want to have to fence my seafood with a pair of chopsticks before eating it.

I shouldn't have told you that story. Now I'm too grossed out to eat that big bowl of crab salad sitting in my fridge. Anyway, the next time you can't get your kids to eat their veggies, give 'em a choice between broccoli and a live, baby octopus. They'll make the right choice. If you live on the coast and have access to fresh crab, by all means, use it instead of the imitation stuff. Just make sure the crab is not alive and kickin' before serving it to your guests. Enjoy – and happy fencing!

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Crab Salad
(Printable Version)

Chunky Ingredients:
3/4 cup red onion, finely diced
2 stalks celery, finely diced
1 1b. imitation crab, chopped
4 hard-boiled eggs, chopped

Dressing:
3/4 cup mayonnaise (light mayo works OK)
1/4 cup sweet pickle relish (sugar-free works great), drained of excess liquid
1 tsp Dijon mustard
1 TBSP chopped fresh dill
1 tsp lemon juice
2 pinches of salt
1/8 tsp pepper
1/8 paprika

In a large bowl, combine the red onion, celery, imitation crab, and hard-boiled eggs.

In a small bowl, combine the dressing ingredients. Add the dressing to the bowl containing the crab mix and gently stir to combine. If the mixture looks a little dry, add some additional mayo. Taste for salt and adjust as needed. Cover and refrigerate for two hours before serving.

Serving Ideas:
Serve on a bed of your favorite salad greens or make a sandwich using Greek pita, bolillo rolls, tortillas, or your favorite kind of bread. You can also serve this as an appetizer with your choice of snack crackers.

Ranch Chicken and Potatoes

My Venture into the Outback
I love Outback Steakhouse. They have great food but you walk in a size 6 and waddle out a size 16. The cheese fries with bacon and ranch dipping sauce are out of this world but they are a coronary just waiting to happen. I'm not much of a steak eater so I normally order a chicken or fish dish. They used to serve (and probably still do) a dish called Alice Springs Chicken. It is a chicken breast that has been marinated in honey mustard sauce, topped with mushrooms, bacon, and cheese then baked to perfection. Very tasty but a bit fattening. Add to that the cheese fries, a salad with fat-laden croutons, some of the Bushman Bread bathed in butter, and a delectable dessert and you will have consumed the same amount of calories as the average Ethiopian does in a year.

I came up with this recipe as a way to get some of the same flavor profiles without all of the guilt afterwards. In one dish, you get some chicken, potatoes, ranch dip, mushrooms, cheese, and bacon – with a lot less calories and fat but all of the same great taste. This dish is perfect for small dinner parties. I like to serve it in individual au gratin dishes but it also works great "family-style" in a larger glass dish. The recipe can be easily doubled or tripled if you need to serve more people. You HAVE to try it! G'day mate – and happy eatin'!

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Ranch Chicken and Potatoes
(Printable Version)

Ranch Dip
8 oz light sour cream (or regular sour cream)
1-1/2 TBSP Ranch Dip Mix (from a 1-oz packet)

Marinade
2 chicken breasts
1 tsp of Ranch Dip Mix
3 TBSP of the prepared Ranch Dip as prepare above

Mushroom Topping
1-1/2 TBSP butter
8 oz white mushrooms, sliced
1 large shallot, minced
2 cloves garlic, minced
1/4 tsp dried thyme
1 TBSP water
2 tsp soy sauce
Pepper to taste

Ranch Potatoes
2 cups cubed frozen hash browns (such as Ore-Ida Southern-Style Hash Brown Potatoes), thawed
1/2 TBSP oil
The remaining Ranch Dip Mix

Additional Toppings
4 oz 2% sharp cheddar (or regular sharp cheddar), shredded
2 to 3 TBSP of real bacon bits (sold in the salad dressing aisle)
1 scallion (the light and dark green parts), chopped

Prepare the ranch dip by mixing the sour cream with 1 1/2 tablespoons of the ranch dip mix.

Add one teaspoon of the powdered ranch dip mix to the chicken breasts and massage into the meat. Place the chicken in a sealable bag and add 3 tablespoons of the prepared ranch dip to the breasts. Seal and use your hands to massage the dip all over the chicken then refrigerate for 3 hours. Cover the remaining prepared dip and refrigerate it until it is needed later. Reserve the remaining powdered mix for use on the potatoes.

After the chicken has marinated for three hours, preheat the oven to 400F. Start the mushroom topping by heating a large skillet over medium-high heat. When hot, add the butter. As soon as it melts, add the mushrooms and flatten them into an even layer. Sprinkle the shallot over the mushrooms and sauté for three minutes without stirring. After three minutes, reduce the heat to medium, stir, and heat an additional three minutes. After three minutes, stir again, and heat an additional three minutes. Add the garlic, thyme, and some pepper then cook for one minute longer. Add the water and soy sauce, stir, and allow the liquids to evaporate (about 30 to 45 seconds longer). Spoon the mushrooms onto a clean plate.
While the mushrooms are cooking, add the frozen cubed potatoes to a microwave-safe bowl, cover with plastic wrap, and heat for two to three minutes, stirring them once during heating. Add 1/2 tablespoon of oil to the heated potatoes and toss. Sprinkle the leftover powdered dip mix over the potatoes and some black pepper to taste. Stir to combine. Taste for salt and adjust as needed.

After the mushrooms have finished cooking, wipe out the skillet, add one tablespoon of oil, and increase the heat to medium-high. When the oil is hot, add the marinated chicken. Add some pepper to the top of the each breast. Sauté on the first side for two minutes, flip, then sauté the other side for one minute longer. Place the chicken into two individual au gratin dishes or two small pyrex dishes (or add both pieces to one 8x8" glass dish). The chicken will not be fully cooked after three minutes but will finish cooking in the oven.

Add one cup of the potatoes around the sides of each chicken breast. Spread 2 tablespoons of the prepared ranch dip on top of each breast. Pile some of the mushrooms on each of the dip-covered breasts. You may have some of the mushrooms leftover. If so, use them for another purpose.

Add two ounces of cheese in a heaping pile to each of the chicken breasts. If any of the cheese gets on the potatoes, don’t worry. Bake for 17 minutes. Add 1 to 2 tablespoons of the bacon bits to top of the chicken and potatoes in each dish. Bake another 3 minutes. Remove from the oven and garnish each chicken breast with a dollop of the prepared ranch dip and some of the chopped scallion.

Tex-Mex Biscuits and Gravy

My Venture into Fusion Cuisine:
One look at my big batootie and you'll know I love biscuits and gravy and Tex-Mex cuisine. I think it's really fun to create new dishes by putting creative spins on traditional recipes. A couple of years ago, I entered a few recipes in the Pillsbury Cook-Off. This is one of the recipes I entered. I didn't win but I still think it's a great recipe and a nice change from traditional biscuits and gravy. It does not have to be spicy unless you want it to be. If you want a mild version, simply leave out the red pepper flakes and buy a mild taco seasoning. In this respect, the whole family can enjoy it instead of just your fire-breathing husband and that crazy guy down the street with 14 cats who is always talking to his mailbox.

From the picture, this dish looks really fattening, doesn't it? It's not! As photographed, I prepared it using a lighter method to reduce the calorie and fat content. Figure-friendly foods do not have to be bland and uninteresting. Yes, this recipe is wonderful with all of the fat and calories but it is just as tasty lightened up. The recipe below gives you a choice between the normal method of preparation as well as a lighter alternative. You choose which one sounds best to you. If you make it, let me know what you think by adding a comment at the bottom of this page. Enjoy – and happy eating!

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Tex-Mex Biscuits and Gravy
(Printable Version)

1 can canned biscuits (or make them from scratch!)
1 pound breakfast sausage
2 TBSP butter
3 TBSP flour
1 packet taco seasoning (mild or hot)
Pinch of red pepper flakes (optional)
2-1/2 cups milk
Salt and pepper to taste

Preheat oven and bake the biscuits per the package instructions.

While the biscuits are baking, brown the breakfast sausage in a large skillet over medium heat, breaking the sausage into smaller pieces as it cooks. When the sausage has browned, tilt the skillet and estimate how much oil has accumulated. You need about two tablespoons of rendered fat. If you have more than two tablespoons, remove the excess. If you do not have enough, add enough butter to make roughly two tablespoons of total fat (it does not have to be exact).

Add the flour and stir to combine. Cook about 6 minutes, stirring occasionally. Add the taco seasoning packet and some red pepper flakes (if using). Stir and continue cooking about one minute longer. Slowly whisk in the milk. Heat until the gravy is simmering, stirring occasionally as it cooks. Breakfast sausage and taco seasoning packets can contain a lot of sodium. Therefore, you may not need to add a lot of salt (if any). Taste the gravy and add some salt and pepper, if needed. Continue to cook the gravy for about two minutes or until the gravy reaches your desired level of thickness. If needed, add a little more milk if the gravy gets too thick. Serve immediately over hot biscuits.

Lighten it up!
As pictured above, I used a lighter method for making these Tex-Mex Biscuits and Gravy.
1) I used reduced-fat biscuits.
2) I used 12 oz of Jimmy Dean Reduced-fat Sausage (instead of 16 oz of the full-fat stuff). Turkey sausage works great, also!
3) I drained the sausage on paper towels and wiped out the skillet before proceeding.
4) I added only one tablespoon of butter (instead of two).
5) I used skim milk.

So if you think it looks good, try using the lighter method sometime. You'll never miss all of the calories and fat.

Aunt Dorothy's Cabbage Slaw

My Venture into Slaw:
My mother mentioned to me recently that her aunt (my great aunt) used to make this wonderful cabbage slaw. I'm not a big cabbage person so this recipe did not initially appeal to me. It also seemed kind of weird to have uncooked ramen noodles as a primary ingredient. My mother dug out the recipe and told me that I should try it sometime. I had planned to dismiss her recommendation – as I had ignored her advice to buy stock in Microsoft twenty years ago.

A few days later, I was writing down my grocery list and saw the recipe on my kitchen counter. Since I was going to the store, I thought I would go ahead and get the ingredients and give it a try. After all, I already had most of the ingredients in my pantry so, if I ended up throwing it all out, it would not have been a huge waste of money.

I mixed all of the ingredients together and made myself a plate of the cabbage slaw and sat down for a light lunch. I have to tell you this. I was hooked after my first bite. It was crunchy. It was slightly sweet. It was slightly tart. It was everything you would have ever wanted in a salad. The ramen noodles made a perfect addition. I loved it and fully plan to add this recipe to my repertoire. I did tweak Aunt Dorothy's recipe a little bit, however. The original recipe had 2 TBSP sugar and 3 TBSP of vinegar. As you will see below, I bumped those up a little bit but feel free to add the original amounts. Make sure you add the dressing immediately before serving. Otherwise, you will lose that wonderful crunch.

Is it possible my mother knew what she was talking about when she said I should try this slaw? I will have to contemplate this further as I eat some more of this crunchy slaw while looking up Microsoft's current stock price. Enjoy – and happy crunching!

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Aunt Dorothy’s Cabbage Slaw
(Printable Version)

1/2 head cabbage (medium), chopped
1 cup shredded carrots
3 green onions (scallions), minced
1/4 cup sunflower seeds
1 cup slivered almonds
1 pkg Ramen Noodles (Any flavor but I normally use Chicken )

Break up the ramen into small pieces and add them to a large bowl. Add the remaining dry ingredients and stir to combine.

Dressing:
2 TBSP sugar (but I normally add 3 TBSP)
3 TBSP vinegar (but I normally add 4 TBSP)
Seasoning packet from the Ramen Noodles
1/2 cup vegetable oil

Vigorously whisk the first three ingredients together to dissolve the sugar. Slowly add the oil while continuing to whisk vigorously. Add the dressing immediately before serving and stir to combine.

Oven-Baked Chicken Chimichangas

My Venture into the Exciting World of Chimichangas:
I had my first chimichanga at Chi-Chi's Restaurant when I was in high school. My Spanish class went there for dinner at the end of the school year for a little "cultural enrichment." I have to tell you that going to Chi-Chi's for cultural enrichment is a lot like going to Saudi Arabia for Fashion Week. During the festivities, my teacher insisted that we all speak Spanish. She had even arranged for a Spanish-speaking waitress that night.

Before the waitress had taken our orders, I noticed that the guy seated next to our table, who looked visibly annoyed at having to sit next to 20 teenagers slaughter the Spanish language, had ordered a little pouch of heaven. Not knowing what it was, I asked the waitress (in Spanish, of course) what he was eating. She said, "Una chimichanga." I instantly knew I had to eat this chimichanga thing because, if anything, it had a really cool name. I ordered the chimi and, to sound really mature and adult-like, also requested a virgin raspberry daiquiri – which I unknowingly mispronounced "die-query."

Minutes later, the chimichanga arrived and it tasted as good as it looked. I even thought I might be getting a little tipsy until my teacher, who was seated next to me, informed me that my "virgin die-query" did not have any alcohol in it. Oh. Well, I wondered why she allowed a 14-year-old to order a mixed drink. Anyway, in the middle of dinner, a classmate who was seated on the other side of the table, said in Spanish, "How do you say 'fire' in Spanish?" Perplexed, my teacher asked why. The girl then pointed to the table behind us and some guy was using his hand to try and put out a raging fire on his tablecloth. Our teacher sprang into action and hurriedly escorted us out of the restaurant. The fire was quickly doused but we were not allowed to return inside to finish our meal.

As we were boarding the bus, my teacher asked me if I was feeling alright. Not knowing what she was talking about, she pulled a mirror out of her purse and allowed me to look at my face. During a span of about 15 minutes, my eyes had nearly swollen shut and I had developed Angelina-Jolie lips. I was obviously suffering an allergic reaction to something. Fifteen years and a hundred daiquiris later, I'm still trying to get those lips back -- and the only thing that has swollen during that time period has been my backside.

Whenever I fix these chimichangas, it takes me back to that eventful evening I had at Chi-Chi's oh so many years ago. Because my chimichangas are not fried, they are a lot healthier but just as tasty. So make some new memories and cook up some of these chimis today! Buena suerte – y disfruta la comida!

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Oven-baked Chicken Chimichangas
(Printable Version)

1 1/2 cups cooked chicken, roughly chopped
1/2 tsp chili powder
1 tsp dried oregano, crushed
1 tsp ground cumin
1/4 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp kosher salt (or 1/4 tsp table salt)
1/4 tsp black pepper
5 scallions, finely chopped
1/2 cup drained and rinsed black beans
2 TBSP chopped fresh cilantro (or baby spinach)
3/4 cup salsa
8 oz freshly shredded monterrey jack cheese
7 flour tortillas (Taco-size, about 8 to 9")
Vegetable oil or olive oil for brushing

Preheat oven to 400F. In a large bowl, combine the chicken, cumin, oregano, chili powder, garlic powder, salt, pepper, scallions, black beans, and cilantro. Add the salsa and cheese. Stir to combine. Taste for seasoning and adjust as needed.

Brush 4 tortillas on one side very lightly with water then place them in a stack on a clean kitchen towel. Wrap the towel around the tortillas. Microwave the tortillas for about 25 seconds. This heats the tortillas enough to make them pliable.

Remove one tortilla from the kitchen towel and rewrap the others to keep them warm. Add 1/3 cup of the filling to the center of the tortilla. Wrap the chimichanga like you would a burrito. Fold the left and right sides of the tortilla up over the filling then roll it starting from the bottom to completely enclose the filling. You should not roll the chimi too tightly or the tortilla will tear (or later burst during baking). Place the chimi seam-side down on a parchment-lined baking sheet. Repeat with the other tortillas – heating additional tortillas in the microwave when needed.

Brush the tops and sides of each chimi with some oil. Bake for 23 to 26 minutes or until the chimis are golden and crispy. Serve with additional salsa, sour cream, or pico de gallo.

Alternative Preparations:
1) Use freshly grated 2% sharp cheddar. Regular cheddar is also tasty but releases a lot of oil when it melts. Pepper jack cheese works great for those who appreciate things on the spicy side. Feeling naughty? Use 12 oz of cheese. It's really tasty that way but increases the caloric content and level of saturated fat considerably.
2) Make it vegetarian! Instead of chicken, add some red bell peppers, corn, and additional black beans.
3) Use whole-wheat or low-carb tortillas.
4) Instead of regular salsa, use salsa verde. It's really tasty this way!

Cornbread Salad

My Venture into Salads
I love this salad. It's really tasty and easy to make because I get most of the ingredients from a salad bar at my local mega mart. This way, the veggies are already washed and ready for me to use. I have to say that this is not so much a recipe as a method of preparation. I make it differently every time I put it together depending on the veggies I'm in the mood for that day. To give you an idea of what to get, I'm breaking down the ingredients into categories to serve as a guide – but feel free to mix it up however you would like. A well-stocked salad bar should have many of the items listed below. The goal is to add stuff that you and your family like to eat. This salad is a great way to get kids to eat their vegetables. It's really tasty and stays fresh for days in the fridge. Enjoy – and happy salad-making!

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Cornbread Salad
(Printable Version)

This is less of a recipe and more of a technique. To start, pick up the following from a salad bar:
PROTEINS: About 1/2 cup (such as chopped ham, chopped turkey, imitation crab, bacon bits, etc)
CHEESES: About 1 cup (I usually get a mixture of cheddar, monterrey jack, and parmesan)
VEGGIES: About 2 cups (I get a mixture of different kinds such as bell peppers, red onions, green onions, red beans, black beans, snow pea pods, broccoli, cauliflower, shredded carrots, radishes, seeded cucumbers, corn, cherry tomatoes, etc)
GREENERY: About 2 TBSP, finely chopped (such as flat-leaf parsley, cilantro, baby spinach, arugula, chives, jalapeño, etc)
OTHER: About 1/4 cup (a mixture of stuff like sunflower seeds, slivered almonds, dried cherries, sliced olives, sun-dried tomatoes, etc)

*The salad bar I use rarely has corn so I have to buy it separately fresh or frozen. Sometimes, I have to buy the black beans in a can. I then drain and rinse them before adding to the salad. I normally buy fresh jalapeños then seed and dice them when I get home Note: Items such as tomatoes and unseeded cucumbers give off a lot of liquid. Feel free to use cherry tomatoes, for example, but add them right before serving or the cornbread may get soggy.

Now that you have gotten all of the stuff from the salad bar, you will need:

1 8.5-oz corn bread mix, prepared and baked per the instructions on the box (I prefer Jiffy)

Dressing:
1/2 cup sour cream (I always use light sour cream)
1/2 cup mayonnaise (I always use light mayo)
1/2 of a 1-oz packet of Ranch Dip Mix

Instructions:
Bake the cornbread per the package instructions and let it cool to room temperature. Why not buy cornbread from the bakery section of your local mega mart? I've tried. At least in my part of the country, the texture of the corn muffins and cornbread is more like cake than home-baked cornbread. When you add vegetables (which contain a lot of water) to cornbread from the bakery section, the cornbread turns to goo. Perhaps your local mega mart makes better cornbread so check it out if you do not want to make your own.

While the cornbread is baking, whisk together the dressing ingredients. It will seem very salty and strongly flavored. Don’t worry – it's a small amount of dressing for the amount of cornbread and veggies. Refrigerate until needed.

If you need to chop some of the veggies from the salad bar, now would be a good time.

To assembly the salad, crumble the cornbread in a large bowl. Add all of the stuff you bought from the salad bar. Add the dressing and gently stir everything to combine. Don't forget – you should not add watery vegetables such as tomatoes until right before the salad is served. Cover and refrigerate the salad for 2 to 4 hours to allow the flavors to mingle. Stir gently before serving.